Justification for Game

"Game" has been under a lot of attack lately - it's manipulative, it's not genuine, it's selfish, blah, blah, blah. The truth is, game works. It isn't all magical that'll get any guy any girl he wants, but it works. It improves the chances for all guys, and their ability to get higher quality girls.

I just happened to bump into this video below, and realized that women have been getting "game advice" forever now. It may not be as clinical or logical as men's advice, but they've been studying how to get men they want, from theory to techniques, since they were early teenagers. Now we, as men, are trying to learn the same things and all of a sudden we're sleazebags.

Hypocrites.

The End Of The Game?

I'm moving away from the small town I live in. I'm currently looking for a job in NY, DC, LA, San Diego, or San Fran. Though I'm excited about wherever I'm moving to, I will somewhat miss my "semi-girlfriend" - an MLTR I've been dating for over a year. I've invited her to come with me wherever I go, and if she does, she'll be my official "girlfriend" - monogamous, traditional, girlfriend.

Just read something on Johnny Wolf's site, he talked about "real sex vs pick up", thought it was a good read.

The other night I couldn't sleep, I kept thinking about all the girls I've hooked up with since joining the pick up artists community. After reading "The Game" by Neil Strauss, studying seduction, taking a bootcamp, and getting good enough to f-close consisantly, I started having more sex and with better quality women.

I ended up sleeping with girls that normally would have been out of my league, models, actresses, and the hot blondes I used to only fantasize about.

Game allowed me to sleep with girls I normally couldn't have, and also have sex with them sooner than ever, without ever taking them out on a real date. This is all sounds fun and trust me…it was. But thinking back, I can't remember the last time I slept with a girl that I actually cared about, and actually cared about me.

For those in the game: Learn the game, sleep with the superstars you always dreamed to have, and have fun. Fuck a couple hot blondes and get it out of your system. You deserve it, and if you don't you might regret it later on in life.

For those finishing the game: It's time for me to re-learn how to have real relationships and to sleep with girls that I actually care about. Even if it means I miss some opperunties to fuck the HB10, at this point in my life I'd rather make a geniune connection.

Just my rants and thoughts for the day,

Warm Regards,

Johnny Wolf

Taking A Book To The First Date

Just read something from a DC dating blogger, and he talked about a technique to take a book to the first date. This is a little more "Gamey" for my taste, but he made some excellent points on why you should take a book, especially when the date is less considerate or less feminine.

I stumbled on this next tip by accident. I had a date with a Polish
girl and something told me I wasn't going to go very well and that
I should bring some entertainment. I brought a book. Sure enough,
one hour after the date began, she told me it was time to end the
date because "We need to start slow, like in La Petit Prince." I
had my book with me so I ordered another drink and cracked it open.

Soon after I started taking a book with me to every date. First, it
serves as a great conversation starter that gets the date started
on an interesting tone. You can take it a step further by using it
to mold your image depending on the book you take. If the girl sees
you as a pensive intellectual, how about you take some literature?
If she sees you as an adventurer, maybe some sort of travel book.

Second and more importantly, taking a book discourages bad
behavior.

In D.C. I have been out with a lot of sassy and "in charge" girls
who can be a little aggressive and blunt without their words. When
I don't like what I'm hearing, all I have to do is reach for my
book, or just glance at it. She immediately gets the hint that if
she doesn't shape up I have other options. It's kind of a nuclear
option to get the exact type of behavior you want in a girl and
especially works well on overconfident girls (think lawyers).

One last perk of taking books is that it's no longer a big deal if
she's late. You'll remain apathetic and aren't reduced to staring
at your phone like an idiot wondering if you're being stood up or
not. You'll lose track of time and may even be a little disappointed
once she finally arrives because you were in the middle of a good
part.

For less Westernized and feminized countries you don't need this
move, so I've never done it in South America. But in the States I
do it all the time.

Dark Side Of "Getting Too Good"

I'm only half-assed in the game. I know of people who go out 3 times a week, and they are much better than I am. I don't know how they feel about game, but I'm already starting to feel myself getting a bit too "methodical" when it comes to the first date. I know what to do when I get a number, what to say the first time I get her on the phone, where to suggest meeting for the first time, subjects to talk about, how to bounce them to the next area, where the next area is to "take a walk", when to make my first "physical" move, and how to try to get them to my place from that area. I'm still excited on each date, doing the best I can to follow the pattern that works best for me, but what happens if it works too well? What happens if it becomes too easy and I no long get excited about it?

Below is a letter I've read in Virgil Kent's blog, talking about the exact same thing.

Back in those days I remember how excited I was just to get a phone number in a weekend (and that"s counting Thursday). If I told you my strike out percentage you"d probably stop reading right now. But back then there was a rush about it, a newness, it felt so good when somehow I was saying the right things and then somehow or another a girl went back to my place on rare occasion. But things can change.

The thing is that you stay in this game long enough and one of the first things to go is excitement. A man can become so methodical, X"s and O"s. I went out one night this weekend on Saturday and got four numbers. Witness say I was on fire that night. Three or four years ago I"d be on cloud nine at this point. But as soon as I woke up Sunday morning disillusionment set in. Even if I did have time (and I don"t) in a perfect world how the hell could I see four girls in one week (there"s a way). But that"s just more work for me. The reality is that for a guy to increase his chance of getting one date in this city he has to pull three to five numbers in a weekend. If you pull five, two will not pick up, call back or text back. One will be flaky and play text games, one will maybe meet you out here and there and finally the last will actually show up to the date.

For me 90% of success on the first date is simply getting the girl to materialize at the location, it"s like herding fucking cats. Speaking of dates, I don"t get excited as much as I used to about them anymore. They"ve somehow become this false routine that I"ve memorized. I already know what I"m going to wear, I already know the topics of conversation I"ll speak on, I already know how I"m going to try to get back to her place. I"m pretty sure that women at my age already know the same things only in the end they already know the excuses why I can"t come back.

The second thing to go is the sex or the joy from it. The more sex you have the more you realize how bad most girls are at it. Honest to blog I"ve been banging a girl and thinking about going home to masturbate (there is something very sad and disturbing about that last statement, not to self make appointment to see therapist).

The last thing that goes is the beauty of women. This might prove how green I was but I used to walk around and see so many "beautiful" women in DC. When I described them I"d use that term "beautiful", like some kid who just saw his first sunrise or snowfall ever. I rarely use that term anymore, I don"t allow those words to leave my lips. It gets worse than not seeing though. My boys, the guys that have really been in the game for more than a decade, it"s like they can"t see past the flaws. It got so bad with this one guy I"d think that the girl was a perfect ten and I swear he"d complain about "the start of future crows feet" ... WTF?!? WTF does crows feet have to do with anything! Can you fuck crows feet, I"m saying? Point being he"d find any flaw in any woman and every woman he was with…. even if he had to make it up. We become sharks, keep moving.

On this blog and others like it, I know at times it sounds so glamours. The women, the late nights, the adventures, swinger parties. But all you get to hear about is the victories and how it is when things go the right way. Nobody blogs about the strikeouts, insane bar tabs and trips to the free clinic. Nobody writes about cold leads, the lonely cab rides home, angry boyfriends/ husbands calling your phone one minute threatening to kill you the next minute crying and wanting to know what really happened, the truth. There is disappointment in a vagina and that"s all the truth you need to know about women. Please believe me there is a price you pay for this, it"s not free, and often it"s your humanity.

Now ask yourself, do you really want it, this and everything that comes with it? I can show you the way through the door, but ask The Rookie, the game is cold son, ice cold on the other side.

Ultimate Guide To Breakups - Best Of Craigslist

I was just browsing Best Of Craigslist one day, and here's a post called "ultimate guide to breakups". It doesn't seem like it's written by someone in the "seduction community", but it's full of techniques that correspond with the seduction community ideas. The two biggest values all those techniques conveyed were frame control (pulling her into your world instead of vice-versa) and non-supplication (non-neediness)

You can smell it coming. Your paramour has left an ominous message on your voicemail. S/he wants to talk. Perhaps you have been invited to meet him somewhere public. Maybe she's cancelled a date, and is meeting you at your place instead. But you're not an idiot and you can anticipate what's next: your ass is about to get dumped. C'est la vie.

Here is your foolproof guide to navigating your breakup. Follow these simple directions and I can guarantee a minimum of stress and heartbreak. If you desire, this technique will ensure your probability of reconciliation is maximized. Want her back? Listen well:

1. On the day you get the news, listen very calmly. Say as little as possible. You will probably hear some BS like, "It's not you - it's me" or "I just need some space for a while" or "let's still be friends"... blah blah blah. Do not argue. Accept everything s/he says. S/he may become emotional. Make no move to comfort him or her. When s/he has finished, do not linger. Say goodbye and leave. If you are in your own home, show him or her the door. A chaste hug is OK, but under NO circumstances should you offer or accept a goodbye kiss, a final quickie, or any of that shit. If you're at a restaurant, do not hang around to split the tab: guys - pay the bill and leave. Ladies - just bail. There is no need to be sterile or brusque, by all means be courteous and kind. Understanding even. But wait until your (now) ex is out of earshot to cry like a bitch.

If you get the news over the phone (ouch), the same rules apply. Just hang up.

If you get a voice/email message, DO NOT respond. Chances are a relationship that ends electronically can't be salvaged, but don't make things worse by taking the bait.

2. The bad news is, this is the hard part. The good news is, this is the part of the Ultimate Guide to Breakups over which you have the most control. It is the centerpiece of the method, and your stamina during this phase will determine your success later on. Want the secret? Here is is:

DO NOTHING.

At first you will be sad. Possibly very sad. Get out of the house. Distract yourself. Hang out with your friends - preferably the ones your ex doesn't know too well, because s/he will be checking up on you. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you contact your ex. For anything.

Chances are after a few days s/he will contact you, "just to see how you're doing." Do not respond. Let it go to voicemail. Don't call back. Delete the email. It's that simple. It'll be hard, but hang in there. Don't let your curiosity get the best of you. You are under no obligation to respond to someone who has kicked you to the curb.

Maybe you've been together for a while and s/he has left personal items in your home. This is the only circumstance under which it's ok to respond. Wait at least 24 hours before you reply. Tell your ex that you will FedEx his/her stuff. Pay for the fastest method you can afford. If s/he insists upon picking it up, leave it someplace safe and make sure you're NOT there when s/he arrives. Make your interaction courteous and brief. Get off the phone as quickly as possible.

If you do not receive a call within a month, you probably won't get a call until s/he drunk dials you many years from now. Move on.

The sooner s/he calls you after dumping you, however, the better your chances are for reconciliation. Again, do not call back. Stay tough. You are now in control of the situation.

3. The sooner the first post-breakup call comes, the more calls/texts/emails you will likely receive. DO NOT RESPOND to any of them... yet. In these modern times you may also be privy to his/her evocative facebook updates, blog posts, reality TV show episodes, whathaveyou. Make no contact. If you absolutely must be in the same place at the same time, try to look fit and happy and surrounded yourself with people s/he doesn't know.

Right around this time (unless you were dumped for someone else) your ex is beginning to experience the downside of singleness. S/he may be feeling lonely and horny, and start wondering if s/he made the right choice. That is exactly what you want. Let him/her fucking stew in it. Your patience will be rewarded.

4. By now, your ex is curious about you. Maybe s/he's even been seeing some new people. But the fact that you have made a clean break with such poise will be a blow to the ego. Remember, the opposite of love is not hate. The opposite of love is indifference. S/he will be thinking, "Was I really so easy to get over?" and "Gee - maybe it really WAS me." If you've done this right, you will receive a call (or email) inviting you to "hang out." Perhaps the tone will be casual, perhaps it will be desperate. Either way, congratulations for getting this far. The ball is now in your court.

5. Proceed carefully from here. Eagerness could lead to a booty call, but little more. Ask yourself: what do I want? If you want to resume a relationship, wait 48-72 hours before responding. Say you're unavailable at the time your ex suggests, but recommend another meeting time at least a week in the future. You name the place. From here on out, everything is on your terms.

6. Let nature take its course. If your ex is ready to give it another shot, s/he will be dressed like it's a first date. If the sexual tension is palpable, you may choose to knock boots and sort out the details in the sticky afterglow. If you can contain yourself, feign trepidation and ask him/her to meet you again - also in a place you select. Build anticipation. Make him/her work for it. If executed correctly, your ex will be so grateful to have you back s/he will be on his/her very best behavior, possibly for years to come.

7. Repeat as necessary.

Asian Fountain Of Youth Kiss Trap

Below is something I've found from Johnny Wolf, called the "Asian fountain of youth kiss trap". It's interesting, thought I'd share it.

When she asks you your age, which cougars always do, I tell them I'm 57. I keep my composure and don't laugh, so they'll wonder for a second if I'm lying or not. Now obviously I don't look that old, I'm only 27 so they'll call me out o it.

I tell them that it's because I'm Asian, we always look young forever. Which she'll agree to.

Then I'll tell her about the secret of the Asian Fountain of Youth (you don't have to be Asian, you can just make something up about your background to make it seem exotic and unique).
"I heard it's something to do with our genetics, but did you know that if you kiss an Asian guy you'll look beautiful and remain young forever as well?"

*pause pause pause* - Make sure you don't fuck it up by talking. Just hold.

I've done this kiss trap a bunch of times and usually get one of the following two responses:

1. She kisses me right away - The first time I did this was at a really classy bar in Downtown LA and this smoking hot blonde just kisses me right away and then says, "Well I had to find out!"
2. She'll be intrigued, kind of laugh it off, and change the subject - However, you've now successively set the kiss trap, and it'll be in the back of her mind the entire night. This is how you build sexual tension. It's been twenty times easier to go for the kiss later after setting up this trap than it has been without it.

But what if I'm not Asian? Use this concept of the Wolf Trap and Kiss Traps to start planting your own sexual tension traps with women you're in conversation with.

Example:When talking about ourselves, I'll mention that I have two outstanding qualities. 1. I'm a really amazing kisser, and 2. I'm quite modest.

First Make-Out Off A Cold Approach

So I went visiting my buddy MC in a town 45 minutes away last night. We went bar hopping.

First Bar: No easily available sets, met one girl at the bar, she was getting drinks for her friends (huge mixed set). I struck up a conversation, got her laughing with some good-humored teases about how all those drinks are hers and she's the biggest drunk. When she paid for the drinks, she went back to her friends - botched set.

Analysis: No real attraction, her laugh was courteously conditioned when a guy says something semi-funny.

2nd Bar, girl 1: I sat at a bar next to a 3-set and struck up a conversation with the girl closest to me. Soon after, MC engaged another one. We chatted for about 5-10 minutes, got her laughing, transitioned smoothly into the handwriting analysis test. She was amazed, and I asked:

Me: From a scale of 1 to 10, how close was I?
Her: Pretty damn close
Me: In that case, I would like you to write down your number under the signature
Her: No.......no...........I don't give out my number to strangers, that's how you get into trouble
Me: That's true, but I'm not a stranger, I know all about your deepest inner thoughts.

Her friend (the one that MC isn't engaging) went up to her and said "I'm going to the bathroom, would you like to come?" She told me "She'll be right back", I know what that usually means, I smiled at her, "Have a good night". She said "No, I'll be back", I kept smiling, "yeah, okay". Soon after, MC lost his girl to the couple going to the bathroom too. Later on, MC told me they were drinking in a different area of the bar.

Analysis:

• There could be many reasons why she didn't give me her number, but she might've been taken.
• I'm assuming when I persuaded her for her number, she gave her friend a hint to drag her away, but I didn't catch that hint.
• Why did she go the extra mile to try to convince me she'll be back? Do women get the extra joy of having a guy genuinely believe one of her lies?

2nd Bar Girl 2: 2 minutes after girl1 left, another girl went up to the bar to settle her tab. I used a situational opener and we got into a conversation. She's going to a small food/bar with her friends. It was a 5 minute quick number close on a piece of napkin, then I asked her to write her signature down under it and started the handwriting analysis routine. But right after I started, I paused and said "Hmmmmm......if I do this for you, what would you do for me?" She giggled a little, and I said "How about this, make an animals noise, any animals. Make it convincing". She said she did a great goat impression, and did it, I made fun of her a little for it, and finished the handwriting analysis routine. After I told her that she had a high sex drive, but isn't very creative sexually, as in she wants it in the same position over and over, she disagreed with it. I cockily said "Well, you signature disagrees". MC tapped me on the shoulder and asked me how long it'll be, it perfectly gave me an out before the conversation got boring. I told her "Sorry, I need to get going". She said "You got my number, right?" I told her "Yeah, I'll give you a call sometime". It ended with a hug and me leaving.

About 45 minutes later, I wanted to solidify the number and sent her a text message:
"Having some good food? PS, great goat impression"

No reply. I will try giving her a call Saturday or Sunday afternoon, she could just not be into texting.

Analysis: Did everything correctly - situation opener, got her laughing, went for a quick number, ran handwriting analysis routine after number close to build comfort, left when my friend wanted to leave instead of having her leave first, don't know what I did wrong.

Bar 3: MC and I sat at the bar. I sat on the left seat while MC is on the right. MC opened a set on his right, while during a break from that set, he saw a girl behind me getting to the bar (probably buying drinks). He said "Are you trying to hit on my friend here? Hovering over him like that?" I kept on staring at the TV and not paying attention, it was his set and I didn't want to inject. MC then brought it to my attention and gave that set to me.

The girl said: "Hi"
Me: If you're gonna hit on me, it has to be better than that, you know, like "do you come her often" or "what's your sign" or something other than "hi".
She laughs: So, do you come here often?
Me: Much better, are you gonna buy me a drink too?

She laughs some more, I kept on the cocky and funny tease. She bought a couple of drinks, and I teased her about being the biggest drunk and those are all her drinks. She said "No, I'm getting some rounds for my friends, but I'll take this shot here". We cheered, she took her shot, I sipped on my drink slowly. She was very receptive and gave some strong IOI's, and said "You're welcome to join my friends out there" (on the patio of the bar). I scooted back from my stool, leaving a corner of the stool unused between my legs, and said "Or you can sit down here with me". She gave a cute smiley sigh and said "Okay". She sat on the same stool as me, between my legs. I held her around the waist and touched her up and down, across the breasts but never rested my hand on it. She seemed to enjoy it and touched up my leg but stopped short before my crotch. It turned out that she's from a city 6 hrs away, and just here a couple of times per year, and is driving back the next day. She's hanging with her friends and I live 45 minutes away, fucking logistics.

I had her write her number and Email on a napkin while she's in my arms. After a while, she was about to get up and leave, and I told her "I bet you suck at thumb wrestling". She held out her hand and said "Bring it". I acted surprised, laughing, "Are you serious? Are we really gonna do this?" And we started thumb wrestling. I started this game because I wanted to try to transition into the following game:

Play a stupid game invented by Johnny Wolf called "I'm going to guess your bra size while touching your tits". The trick is I always guess one size smaller than she actually is, making her say "nooo, I'm a D cup!" That's when you say "I don't believe." And touch her breasts saying, okay maybe you are. (don't try this unless you're properly socially and sexually calibrated)

I didn't transition into that game, but it transitioned into something else instead - We thumb wrestling ended up with us moving our arms up and down in the air for 30 seconds, and I somehow got both her thumbs in my right hand. She is trying to slip it away as

I said: Awww......you seem to be stuck.
She: Hey, that's not fair.
Me: Tell ya what, give me a kiss, make it convincing and I'll let you go.
She was hesitating. She almost slipped both thumbs away and I knew I couldn't keep holding on, so I let her go
Me:Here, I let you go, you should give me a kiss to thank me instead.

She was just looking at me instead, so I leaned in for the kiss. I ran my hand across her face and body as we were making out with tongue, and it lasted about 15 seconds. She said "How's this for convincing" as she was getting up to join her friends. I smiled, and said "I'll shoot you an Email", and the next time I'm in that area or you're back here, let's get together. She said "Sure" and that ended it.

Analysis: Nothing probably will come out of this. She's on "vacation mode" and "this doesn't count mode" because she's going back to her home-city the next day. But maybe I'll be able to keep in touch. I go back to a city neighboring hers 2-3 times a year, and she comes here just as often, just maybe.

My very first make-out close off a cold approach (even though it was a warm set opened by MC)

Attraction Switches For Women - Part 1

We all know about the basic attraction switches - funny, intelligent, in good shape, etc. Different PUA's have different lists, thought I'd share a couple of lists. Part one is from Mr M of LSI.

Buying Temperature
a. Definition: Her emotional state is increased by being around you.
b. Done by: Teasing, humor, role plays, "cocky-funny," misinterpretation, games, physical escalation (aka "kino") and dominance, etc.
c. Emphasis on: Humor (particularly push/pull), pre-selection, and dominance.
d. Summary: You don't have to talk about yourself at all - the focus is on fun.
e. Drawbacks: Transferrable, can be easily lost if not accompanied by framing, you can become the dancing monkey.

Intrigue
a. Definition: She is intrigued by talking to you - you have an uncanny understanding of her and other people around her.
b. Done by: Cold reading, Interactive Value Demonstrations, storytelling.
c. Emphasis on: Social Intelligence and showing understanding of her world.
d. Summary: You talk about her, others and your unique experiences. The focus is on intriguing her.
e. Drawbacks: Can feel contrived the more it relies on cold reads, palm readings, etc. Not appropriate or practical in some high-energy situations.

High Value and Sexual Frames
a. Definition: She wants to get to know you and be around you because you are high-value in her eyes. You are a guy whom she could potentially sleep with and even have a relationship with.
b. Done by: Framing, social proof, storytelling, disqualification, leading, sexual hoops, innuendo.
c. Emphasis on: Health and Appearance, Wealth, Pre-Selection, Challenging, Confidence.
d. Summary: You talk about yourself.

'Warm and Fuzzy' Attraction
a. Definition: She sees you as an authentic and real person with integrity and a well-rounded personality.
b. Done by: Storytelling about family, friends, your childhood and vulnerabilities.
c. Emphasis on: Protector of loved ones, willingness to emote, moving life stories.
d. Summary: You talk about yourself, your family and your experiences.
e. Drawbacks: Too much of this and you get boring or one-dimensional.

Vibing
a. Definition: She feels that you are on the same wavelength as her. This actually amplifies existing attraction.
b. Done by: Normalization of conversation, finding topics of common interest, starting to talk more deeply about those topics and finding qualities about her that interest you.
c. Emphasis on: Social intuition, genuinely connecting, qualification.
d. Summary: You and her exchange thoughts about your commonalities and you validate her about qualities that she possesses that are important to you (there is overlap here with the Qualification and Comfort stages of the Love Systems Triad).
e. Drawbacks: If you do too much of this without raising buying temperature, intrigue, etc., you fall into the "let's just be friends" zone, unless she is already attracted to you based on your looks.

The DiCarlo Kino Escalation Ladder

Just randomly stumbled onto this article again. This is basic information that any guy could use, on how to slowly touch a girl, on more and more private areas, until sex happens. This isn't any great big "discovery", and I think most guys know some variations of "the mating dance". But it's great that Vincent DiCarlo put it in a nice list of actions.

The DiCarlo Escalation Ladder is a step-by step formula, followed by a number of laws which govern it's use for maximum effect.

It is designed to provide a smooth escalation, containing no significant jumps that may cause a woman to object. At the same time, the DEL contains no extraneous steps which are non-essential to the seduction process. This results in a FAST escalation sequence which is compatible with a variety of verbal structures, and has been field tested and perfected by myself, Vincent DiCarlo, in hundreds of trials.

Without further marketing, hype or other bullsh*t, I present... the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder!

1. Eye Contact and Initial Conversation
Eye contact is the first step. It's use shows social awareness and always improves your chances of starting a conversation. Start your conversational game shortly after eye contact.

2. Incidental Class 1
The first class of incidental kino involves the arms and hands. Shaking hands, tapping people on the shoulder and brushing arms are all very common things that we do on a daily basis. Done in an incidental manner, ie. occurring merely by chance or without intention or calculation, it is extremely effective at building initial comfort.

Incidental Class 1 Examples:

* Hand shaking
* Arm brushing
* Light touching on her arm to emphasize your points
* Anchoring her arm near elbow to hold her close as you talk
* Standing next to her with your arm touching hers
* High Fives
* Palm Reading

3. Overt Class 1
There is an unmistakable recurring pattern throughout the DEL: incidental kino, followed by overt kino. Overt means open to view or knowledge; not concealed or secret. While incidental kino is usually done in a context which masks your intention, overt kino is not. The incidental kino which precedes it creates the familiarity necessary for the overt kino to be accepted.

Overt Class 1 Examples:

* Holding hands
* Arm in arm escorting

4. Incidental Class 2
Class 2 kino involves any contact which takes place on her torso or legs. This is slightly more intimate than class 1, but does not include erogenous zones such as her breasts, crotch or inner thighs. Those areas are not paid any direct attention until the escalation ramp - to be defined later.

Incidental Class 2 Examples:

* Standing very close with your legs touching hers
* Sitting close together with your legs touching hers
* Lightly and incidentally brushing her abdomen with your hands while talking
* Briefly touching her back with your palm while speaking as if you are pulling her in to hear you better

5. Overt Class 2
Overt class 2 kino is usually done while sitting down. It's not necessary, but definitely a smart place to make the transition to sitting down. This class of kino should be done in a protective, almost romantic manner.

Overt Class 2 Examples:

* Frontal Hugging (done best as a positive reaction to her compliance)
* Escorting her through the bar with your hand on her lower back
* Sitting next to her and placing her leg over yours
* Holding her abdomen on the side while sitting down and talking
* Placing her hand on your thigh

6. Incidental Class 3
Her hair, face and neck are the regions included in class 3. Many guys make the common mistake of touching these areas too soon, with a girl they first met. Girls are surprisingly protective of their hair, face and neck placing these relatively high on the ladder. Another common mistake is that more experienced guys will generally skip this step altogether, only to face last minute resistance later on.

Incidental Class 3 Examples:

* Brushing (or pretending to brush) something off of her face
* Talking very closely with your face touching hers because the environment is extremely loud
* Touching an interesting neckace she's wearing, meanwhile allowing your fingers to lightly caress her neck
* Playfully pinching her cheeks

7. Overt Class 3
The manner in which kino is delivered in overt class 3, is very direct. It is meant to prepare her for kissing, and is done in a very slow, gentle and romantic way. Most of the time you should be sitting down, relaxed and maintaining a good sexual state and strong eye contact.

Overt Class 3 Examples:

* Placing her head to rest on your shoulder
* Moving your face into her neck and smelling her
* Lightly stroking her face with your finger, close in, looking into her eyes
* Running your fingers through her hair, close in, looking into her eyes
* Holding her behind the neck with your palm to the side of her neck, looking into her eyes

Escalation Ramp

While the above steps from 1-7 may take anywhere from 30 minutes to 10 hours, the escalation ramp is very rapid. The duration of the ramp should be about 10 - 30 minutes. Start the ramp very quickly once you have complete isolation in a sex location.

8. Kissing
Start kissing from a very close proximity. Don't come diving in lips first from three feet away. Ideally you should already be in a suitable position for kissing before you try. If you have overt class 3 kino taken care of, you're probably in the right spot.

A technique for building sexual tension - move closely in, slowly as if you might kiss her, and then move away and start talking about something else. This will build the tension and she will wonder when you're going to actually kiss her.

A technique to initiate kissing - try placing your finger just underneath her chin and pulling her mouth towards yours.

Kissing should be light and short at first. You should be the one to pull away first. Don't use too much tounge at first, just use it to tease her, and build anticipation.

9. Kissing Her Neck
Once you have kissed her for a bit, move down to her neck. Kiss it gently, while holding her close to you. Depending on how rough you want to set the mood, feel free to throw in some gentle biting too.

10. Touching the Bare Skin of Her Back
Once you have established kissing both on her mouth and neck, move your hands to her waist and underneath her shirt. Continue to hold her close to you, now with your hands directly on her back.

11. Stomach to Stomach
Now that you have established touching her skin, below her shirt, simply move your hand to the front, and lift her shirt, exposing only her stomach. At the same time lift your shirt as well so that your abdomen is in direct contact with hers.

It seems innocent, but will meanwhile trigger intense sexual feelings inside of her. The only time she feels contact like that is usually when she's naked and having sex.

12. Kissing her Body
Having her shirt pulled up affords the opportunity of moving downwards to kiss and caress the bare flesh of her abdomen. Start kissing her there, along the sides, and move upwards.

Touching and kissing the breasts is optional. It is not necessary, and in some cases can be detrimental to your progress. There are some women who have a negative anchor to their breasts. Inch toward their breasts and feel her reaction. If she becomes increasingly turned on, then go for it. If she starts to close down, skip the breasts until you are already having sex.

13. Incidentally Stimulate Vagina
While you are kissing her body, you can position yourself between her legs and use your midsection to rub against her vagina. If you are kissing her mouth you can position your thigh to stimulate her vagina.

You can also be kissing her body and reach between her legs and plant your hand on the bed below her. Then use your forearm to stimulate her vagina. The key here is that because you aren't using your hand or fingers, she has no basis for objection.

14. Direct Vaginal Stimulation from Behind (Inside Panties)
Once you have really amped her up by incidentally rubbing her vagina, move your hand around to the back and slip it inside her panties and touch her naked ass.

Next, move your hand all the way down and reach her vagina. Start first by touching the area around it. Then proceed to finger her from behind. Women never expect to have it happen this way. Trying to reach your hand down the front of her pants will often be resisted, but from the rear is unexpected and effective.

If she is wearing a skirt or dress, you will instead move your hand up the back of her leg, and reach her vagina that way. Finger her and then proceed directly to step 16.

15. Direct Vaginal Stimulation in Front

Get her heated up by fingering her, and then when once she is sufficiently turned on, undo the front of her pants with your other hand.

You can use the Situationally Relevant phrase "My hand is being crushed" as you do it, although it's usually not necessary. Since she is engaged by the fact that you are fingering her, she will rarely object to your simultaneous undoing of her pants. You may also have her undo her pants, by saying "Unbutton your pants." as you are fingering her.

Moving to the front, you'll be able to get more penetration with your fingers, and get her to the point where she is practically begging for sex. Use a firm "come-hither" motion pulling forward on the front vaginal wall and stimulating her g-spot.

16. Remove Her Pants, Sex

The idea is to get her so heated up by fingering her, that she makes a commitment to sex, verbally or physically.

There are a few ways to go about this. Firstly, it is very important that you don't stop fingering her before her pants are off. Too many times a guy will stop fingering her, and then try to take off her pants, only to get more resistance.

While fingering her you can say "Do you want me inside you?" Which will usually get a "Yes." response. At that point you say "Ok, take off your pants." and continue to finger her until her panties are off, and she's ready to go.

Another option is to skip the question and directly tell her to take off her pants. Usually with your fingers busy at work, she will be more than compliant.

Another technique is to ask her "Do you want me to get a condom?" In 90% of all girls you ask this, they will say "Yes." Not because they are saying they want sex, but because they want to appear safe and level headed. You will interpret this as the permission to get a condom and have sex with her, and it will most likely be met without opposition.

***

Additional Points

1. Higher Levels Unlock Access to Lower Levels
The rungs of the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder may be treated exactly the same as compliance levels. The point is, any time you reach a higher level through situational relevance, it unlocks the lower levels automatically.

A good example of this is in a loud club or bar, you can reach in and talk directly into her ear, getting incidental class 3 kino, touching the side of your face to hers. You are speaking to her in a way that is dictated by the situation, so it is accepted. If you accomplish this without her resistance, all lower levels will become unlocked.

2. Execution of the Escalation Ramp
The escalation ramp, which consists of steps 8-16 is most effectively executed in isolation in a sex location. It is not efficient to start the ramp with the intention of finishing it at a later time. Starting the ramp without finishing it will lead to an increase in flaking and decrease a woman's attraction toward you.

This is because these sexual behaviors were formed thousands of years ago when we were still living in caves. The natural instintual urges, combined with a lack of knowledge of modern-day sexual consequences meant that escalation with a woman would 100% of the time lead to sex.

By executing the ladder correctly, you are matching her genetic sexual programming and giving it to her the exact way that she wants it.

It is acceptable to do the first part of the ramp - kissing - outside of a suitable sex location, but only if you plan on completing the ramp later in that same meeting. It's not to say that kissing a girl on a non-sex meet will destroy your chances, but it certainly won't improve them. Kiss-closes may look impressive and feed your ego, but aren't technically optimum.

3. Incidental Vs. Overt Kino
There is always a question as to how to execute these different pieces of kino. In general, you should spend most of your time in the incidental phase, getting her comfortable with contact in those regions.

This pattern of incidental followed by overt is almost a like a Jedi mind trick. Use the incidental kino in a very non-invasive, very much under the radar manner, and her subconscious will automatically accept the subsequent overt kino.

Since she accepts the overt kino, it is through a process of backwards rationalization that her attraction for you increases. The key is to make the overt kino extremely short. Each overt phase in the initial ladder should have a duration of 5-10 seconds. You're not going to be holding her hand in the club for 5 minutes at a time while in class 1. Keep it short and sweet.

4. Group Ladder Theory
There is quite a bit of evidence supporting the idea of a "group ladder" concept. Within a tightly knit group of girls who share a "collective emotional state" with each other, it is possible that whatever step on the ladder you achieve with one girl can transfer over very easily to the other girls in the group.

In a sense, each group of girls has a ladder, which represents your escalation with that group. If you can comfortably touch and hold a girl at a certain point in the ladder, it creates an implicit trust of "this guy is cool" for the other girls in the group at that same level. Keep in mind, however, this does not include the escalation ramp, although it has been observed to happen with kissing quite readily.

5. DiCarlo Escalation Ladder as a Standalone Method
The DEL provides both a sufficient framework for escalation and a linear step-by-step process such that it could be used as a standalone method. You can use one of the many popular verbal structures out there, but basic conversational skills will suffice, given an elementary understanding of the ladder.

There is an inherent value and attractiveness to a man who can escalate in such an intelligent and socially aware manner, which is why your verbal content does not matter very much when using this method.

The DiCarlo Escalation Ladder combined with enough conversational skill to disengage her critical mind is a very powerful, yet "natural" method.

Mood And State

As my cold-approach game evolves, I'm moving away from "canned openers" to "situational openers". Situational openers are comments you make about something in the specific environment, such as "What kinda drink is that?" or "Wow, this music sucks".

One thing I've noticed is that my mood effects the night a lot. Sometimes I'm in such a great mood, anything I say or do works, a simple "hi" or a playful punch in the arms out of nowhere would get me in conversations with women. I've never really consciously noticed it until I heard Tyler Durden's latest program, "Blueprint".

Tyler calls it "State", someone who's in that magical mood is considered "in state", and "naturals" get in state more often than others. Looking back, the most "in state" I've gotten was last July 4th, 9 months ago. I haven't gotten anywhere close to that since then.

He also talked about "state" should be coming from within, and not relying on an outside stimuli, which is also something I need to learn to do. In the past, I've always relied on validation from a girl, social proof, or a wingman's state to increase my own.

My Very First "Let's Just Be Friends"

So I went visiting my former city over Easter break. 2 weeks before I got there, I made plans with an ex-coworker I number closed in a book store the last time I was in town, about 9 months ago. She is in her mid-30's, Chinese American, been in the USA for 6 years and lived in Canada for 2 before that. I was slightly nervous about this date, because she worked with me, and if I totally fuck this one up, a lot of my ex-coworkers, including the ones I still keep in contact with, would know about my fuck-up. I had to "play it safe" and disable my "push till it becomes awkward, and then push 20% more" attitude.

Sunday night, we met up around 7PM at a fancy little Spanish bar across the street from where we worked together - quiet house music and colorful ambient light, perfect. She doesn't drink much, so I told her I'd order her something as a surprise, and got her a mango puree (Mango juice and rum in a martini glass). I got a Caipirinha, a really popular Brazilian drink. We sat, and chatted. We made some "boring" talk, about our hobbies, and she showed me her new E-book reader, the Kindle from Amazon. Since she's Chinese (I'm Chinese American), I built some comfort about some old commonalities, like how were, as children, were expected to grow up and stuff. It turned out that she grew up in the same city I was born in. I mentioned a park my parents took me to when I was 8 yrs old, and a squire my grandparents took me to when I was 4 to ride my tricycle, and it built tremendous comfort because she frequented those places too.

I then offered to take a walk at the waterfront about 15 minutes away. While I was driving, she commented on how she likes to ride in other people's cars because she doesn't have a car of her own and metros everywhere. Other than the initial hug, I still haven't broken the "touch" barrier. Her words and facial expression seemed warm and kind, but her body language seemed a bit frigid. She wouldn't lean in to me or anything. After about 10 minutes of walking around, I took a seat at a bench at the waterfront. I casually threw in that I've been getting slightly into palm reading, she got somewhat intrigued and asked some follow up questions, I did a 5 minute palm reading routine, and the touch barrier was broken. I held her hand, traced it up and down during the routine, but she took her hand away afterwards.

After the palm reading routine, I transitioned into the handwriting analysis routine for more comfort building and the cube game. I couldn't smoothly escalate kino or create much sexual attraction. I took a small chance. The weather was around 50 degrees and she didn't have a jacket on, and I commented on the fact that she had her arms crossed. I said "All those practical psychology stuff I was just talking about, body language is also a really useful one. Such as right now, with your arms crossed in front of you, it either shows you're defensive about your own personality, or you're just cold". She claims to be cold, so I stood up, led her to stand up as well, and held her in my arms........a prolonged hug that held for a long, long time. I took her head and moved it right onto my chest,

and asked "Feeling warmer?"
She quietly, shyly said "yes".
I petted her hair as I kept on hugging her, "so how long has it been since you've been in someone's arms?"
She answered "3 years".
Me: "Do you like this?"
Her: "yes, but.......well, I'm just going to stop talking"

I gave her a kiss on the forehead, and gave her one last squeeze in a hugging manner and led her back onto the bench, sitting next to me, with her cute, slender body next to mine, and my arm around her shoulder. She still seemed a bit frigid, she wasn't pushing me away, but she also didn't lean her body into mine. I commented that she had her hands together between her thighs. Jokingly, I said "It's cute that your hands are between your legs, you're either really cold, or you're really excited and you just want to touch yourself". She laughed and said "shut up". I grabbed her hands with mine, rubbed them together, gave one of her hands a quick kiss, held it a bit longer, "here, better?". She said "yes".

I tried to transition into another location. We spent some time talking about how pretty the bridge across the water was, and I asked "we should take a drive on that bridge". She didn't say yes or no, so I just do what I normally do and assume we were going. As we are standing up, she asked what time it was, and it was around 9:30. She then asked me "Would you like to do that some other time instead?" I said "Yeah, it's getting late and you have to work tomorrow." While walking back to the car, I offered her a mint and she took it. I choked, I hesitated, I lost my window of opportunity. I should've given her a kiss when she took the mint, but I didn't. I don't know why, but our "connection" made me not want to risk anything, could I emo-ly genuinely care about another person? Nah, that can't be it.

On the drive back, we chatted more about dating (not each other though), and our parents' expectations and stuff. I told her about my parents hierarchy of race preferences, and she told me about hers. With our parents being from similar cultures, the hierarchies were exactly the same. She mentioned "I'd like to meet your parents, because they're from the same city I was". I cockily said "Hah, most women I date have to wait months before meeting my parents, you're not going to weasel your way to the front of the line that easily". She said "No, not like that. We will never date, I'm your big sister". I made some more small talk, and got a bit deeper into more serious subjects, like marriages and stuff. At a stop light, she said semi-jokingly "It's okay, I have a brother, my parents don't expect much out of me, and I give up on myself". I said "give me your hand", as she slowly gives me her hand, I held it gave it a small kiss, looked at her in the eyes, "never give up on yourself, you're a good girl". She smiled shyly and looked down.

As I was dropping her off, I asked "so do I get to check out your apartment?" She said "No, it's a mess, maybe another time". She also offered to help me with "girl advice" as a "big sister", I gave her a hug good night and called it a night.


Things I did well:

• Genuine connection and comfort due to similarities
• Artificial comfort due to intriguing routines

Things I need to improve on:

• Generating more attraction - not one-liner attraction "spikes", but really amp attraction overall
• Take more social risks, go for the kiss like I normally should.

Unsuccessful Conversion to a MLTR

Sex on date 3, but fucked up afterwards.

quick background story:

• Quick number close, not very impressive, HB5.
• Date 1 - quick 1 hr drink at a bar, she had somewhere else to go afterwards, but I got the "first date" out of the way
• Date 2 - I picked her up after work on Monday, took her for a walk, and brought her home for dinner because "I was cooking" - one of those "meals for two in a bag" from a grocery store. We "hooked up", but didn't have sex because it was her time of the month.

We scheduled something for the following Sunday around 4PM. My plans ended early on Saturday night while I was out, so I called her up offering to get together, and picked her up (since I was out anyway) at 10PM, . She came over, and we spent the night.

We had sex both Saturday night and Sunday morning. While she was in my arms afterwards on Sunday morning,

she asked "so are we official?"
Me: What do you mean?
Her: Can I officially call you my boyfriend?
Me: Well, you know I'm not looking for anything monogamous. I enjoy being around you and having you in my arms, but I'm not looking to get into anything serious for a while
Her: Okay, I understand.

She didn't seem too upset about it or anything. We stayed at my place for about two more hours until I dropped her off at her place. While dropping her off around noon to play basketball with the guys like I planned to,

she asked: So do you still want to get together tonight?
Me: It's totally your call
Her: Well, let's not since we already go together today
Me: That's cool, as usual, we can schedule something now, or we can play it by ear and contact each other later
Her: Let's contact each other later, I don't know my schedule yet

I gave her a hug as she left, sensing this will be the last hug I give her, which I was right.

Today during work, I got a text message from her, "I dont think we should see each other anymore because ur not looking for a relationship and i am. Sorry it had to be through a text but i know ur working -Ash". I replied with "I understand, I kinda figured that yesterday. Goodluck w finding that dreamboy of yours.". She responded "Thanks for understanding :) -Ash".

I thought that was that, but she then IM'ed me a few minutes after:

(10:43:37) Her: I just don't think it'd be fair to either of us if we keep seeing each other
(10:43:54) Me: Hah, apparently you didn't have your "closure". :)
(10:44:16) Her: Hm?
(10:45:14) Me: Well, what I usually do with women who're "looking for relationships" is I always tell them "I shouldn't stop you from looking for what you're looking for, but until you find that great relationship of yours, you and I can keep seeing each other"
(10:45:21) Me: But if that's not something you'd like to do, I understand. :)
(10:46:41) Her: That's what you usually do with women? Wow.
(10:47:38) Her: So you think it's ok to use women that are looking for a relationship?
(10:47:47) Me: Well, what I usually do with women who're looking for relationships
(10:48:36) Me: I wouldn't say anyone's "using" anyone else......if two people enjoy being with each other, nobody's "using" anyone. It's just that one person's looking for more, and she is welcome to find that elsewhere.
(10:49:30) Her: Well, good luck
(10:50:48) Me: Thanks, and I wish you the same.
(10:55:29) Her: thank you

She wasn't that pretty, so I didn't really care much to save this one. But I personally need to work more on how to achieve mLTR's.

True Cockblock

In my pickup experiences, I've had a few people here and there I'd attribute an unsuccessful set to, but I've never truly experienced a real cockblock until last Saturday.

I went out with a few local aspiring PUA's. In one fairly crowded bar, I was chatting with Radium , and JGlide opened a set. His target was cute - black chick, petite, 7-8 out of 10 on looks. There was a cockblock, fairly tall, slightly overweight white chick, 6 out of 10. There were two other girls, but they were chatting among themselves. I was just chatting with my friends and Radium said "JGlide needs help", I was semi-drunk, and said "huh"? Radium then told me again, "JGlide needs help" and pointed that way. I saw JGlide, trying to keep the target's attention, while the target was interested, but the cockblock kept on talking to the target. Not only did the cockblock keep talking to her while being rude to JGlide, she made a point to get as close to the target as possible making the target face her as she was talking.

I walked over, got intro'ed in, shook hands with both the girls, and started talking to the cockblock. She politely smiled and tried to shoo me away. I plowed on, and kept on talking. I would ask her random questions, she'd be polite and smile and answer with "yeah, okay" without even attempting to listen to the question. I really dislike plowing, but I just wanted to buy time for JGlide. As she unconciously shifted positions with her body language to keep her distance from me because I invaded her personal space on purpose while talking, I calculatedly shifted positions with her, until I created a physical barrier (which is myself) between the obstacle and JGlide's target. I kept her busy for about 30 more seconds, and I think the obstacle realized what's going on, went around me and got in the target's face and started talking to the target again.

JGlide ejected the set soon after. I asked him what's going on, and he said she's got a boyfriend. I despise the obstacle even more because I now understand she's cockblocking for absolutely no reason, there wasn't even a chance for the target to like JGlide.

JGlide, Radium, and myself were sitting around, chatting, and the 4 girls rejoined each other at a table. One of the 2 other girls that were talking between themselves took out a cigarette but had no light, Axe happened to be ejecting an adjacent set, and took out a lighter, and held it out for her (without knowing anyone in the set). The obstacle from before said to the girls "That was weird, where did he come from" and rolled her eyes. It created a weird vibe for the girls and group-think took over, Axe wasn't interested in the set anyway and went on his happy-go-lucky way after he offered her the light.

Why do some women act like that? Are they so unhappy themselves they would make want to decrease the happiness around them by not letting anyone else in their group get any attention from any guys, under the pretense of "protecting each other"?

Looking back now, I should've fucked up her night by walking up to her after JGlide ejected, and said in a serious tone "What is wrong with you? My friend is trying to be cool and interact with your friend, and your friend obviously enjoyed his company, but you were being extremely rude by constantly interrupting the both of them, did your parents teach you to be anti-social like this?", and not give her an opportunity to say anything back by turning around and walking off. If I did that, I bet she would think twice about cockblocking the next guy. I dropped the ball on doing my part for the community service.

Funny Pick Up Stereotypes By Race

Okay, so the clip above shows pick up stereotypes by race. On cold-approaches alone, it shows black and Hispanics being the most competent, at least most confident, following by whites, then at the very last, the shy Asian kid who wouldn't say anything and stare from afar.

This is only for cold approaches. Personal observations makes me think white and Asian guys play "networking game" extremely well, where you meet new people through social circles, such as friends of friends hanging out or house parties.

Back to the cold-approach stereotypes - there definitely are some truths behind it, I personally went through that "Asian lack of pickup" phase in early college days. I also went through the "white phase" where I go up to a girl with semi-confidence "Hey.....what's up...........yeah..........what's your name" and get politely dissed regularly.

This video is great, it reminds me of how far along I've gone through the road of learning game, and I have at least that far to go.

The Jaded PUA

When growing up, we have some false beliefs about women. They're mostly socially conditioned into our brains for many years, from our mothers to Disney movies to mainstream society. These are some examples of beliefs:

• Women are special, beautiful creatures.
• Women need to be saved and protected.
• Women need to be loved and nurtured.
• You need to make women feel special.
• Women need to be wined and dined and romanced.
• Women want nice guys.
• Women don't like sex.

The PUA community teaches differently. They don't flat out say it, but they hint it. Also doing hundreds of cold approaches and following up on phone numbers, hundreds of first or second dates with the intention of "scoring" confirms this mentality:

• Women are flaky and unreliable.
• Women are emotional and illogical.
• Women only live in the emotion of the moment, do what feels good at the time, and justify their actions to themselves after the fact.
• Women are manipulative and use guys for free drinks and dinners.
• Women are fickle and have short attention spans.
• Women are self-centered and self-interested.
• Women primarily go to clubs for attention and validation from men.
• Women constantly test men, try to devalue them, and try to make them jump through hoops.
• Women try to make men suck up to them and put them on a pedestal.
• Women think their pussies are made of gold and sell them to the highest bidder.
• Women don't know what they really want.
• Women are confused and hypocritical. They'll profess to dislike whorish behavior then blow a guy in a bathroom that night.
• Women are programmed to want to get knocked up by an Alpha Male then ensnare an unwitting Beta Male into raising the child for her.
• Women will cheat on their partners coldly and unemotionally.
• Women are slaves to how their friends and society sees them. They want to sleep around, but have to be discrete about it.
• Society's expectations have given women all kinds of weird hang ups up about sex and hooking up. Their minds are full of strange rationalizations and justifications.
• Women aren't happy for long in a relationship and you have to constantly keep them on their toes and off-balance to stay with them.
• Women are powerless to resist the right type of guy. Even if they're married, they'll get sucked along.
• Women are easily manipulated by simple magic tricks and talk of new agey topics.

Source: http://www.datinggroundwork.com/community

On the other hand, the PUA mentality mostly comes from the way we meet women, and the type of women we meet. If we mostly go to bars and clubs for cold approaches, of course the ones we meet are going to be flakey, unreliable, trying to get free drinks from guys, etc. AFC's don't get tested after a while because they prove their "worth" over months or years of trying to "woo" the same girl, and when they DO succeed, he won't get flaked out on because of the comfort he's built over month or years.

For the same reasons PUA's get laid a lot, they also have the endore constant rejection. Each success is a confidence booster for the PUA while each failure makes him dislike women slightly more. With each game the woman plays, each time he gets flaked out on, he gets slightly more sour, slightly more jaded.

This is a story of a guy named Roosh from DC. Here's a great example of how one back experience can make a PUA more jaded for the next, better girl.